Saturday, January 29, 2011

Good stuff and exciting things

Long Time, lessons learned and a couple more steps in the right direction. I am blessed to have the amazing family and friends that I have. I can't imagine a life without people like them. They laugh with me through the good times, smile with me through my successes and gather near to me through my struggles. Can anyone aske for anything better then that? I wouldn't change it for the world! I'm feeling a little sarcastic today....so read this light heartedly.

Long time...Since I've been home from Idaho I've been working for Lake Las Vegas. It was a bit of a transition from being outside with kiddos all day to sitting in an office for long periods of time. I know this isn't the career of my choice, but I'm blessed to be able to pay my bills and have some mula to play with. I've also taken my GRE and began applying for graduate school and my path is clear now, so I can proudly say that I will be continuing my education in Recreation Therapy. All in these past few months I've been able to enjoy life and face some struggles and even though a few months seems like so long ago...it also feels like it went by way too fast. Time is getting shorter now that I'm getting older. I finally understand what my mom meant by that.

Lessons learned...I have had some battle with some successes and others not quite qualifying as failures but they definately weren't triumphs. For starts dating. Who thought they'd ever have to do this part again. I will tell you that I would give anything to just skip the awkwardness of first dates and the ever lasting worrying of whether this guy likes me or not. So there is lesson number one. I don't have enough time or energy to care if you like me. I think we have chemistry but if you don't call me again I will be ok. You may think that you are something special, and you might be, but the fact that you didn't call me back means you weren't that special FOR me. Lesson number two. I have more fun when I'm being myself, so if you don't like me the way I am, I'm not going to sweat over it. Lesson three. Initially I liked you, so why are you acting like a fool when we go out. Just stop that! I want to be me but I also want you to be you. Lesson 4. The games...oh the GAMES...they need to stop. I am too old and I know where I'm headed, so when you throw a fit when I have other plans or give me the run around for days because you want to play hard to get, I'm just going to wipe my hands of you. Let's cut all the fluffy flirting crap and just get straight to the point. We aren't getting any younger lets just get from a to b asap. Lesson 5 I know what I want and what I'm looking for so if I don't call you, your probably not what I'm looking for. By the way I would also like to mention that I can only send out so many signals for you to pick up. If you don't catch one of them its no problem with me.

These next few lessons are a bit more important and definately not related to dating. Lesson 6. I need to always be working on being a better person. When I take a break from this process I end up hurting myself or someone around me. This will be an eternal process and not something that will eventually end. It has potential to become easier once I make it a habit. Lesson 7 it is harder to be friends with a girl then a guy and it takes more work, but being friends with a girl has way more value and the triumphs in friendship are much sweeter. Girl talk is incredibly important, so its worth the work. Lesson 8 when you make bad decisions (even when you make bad decisions without consciously knowing) people around you know. Lesson 9 people are free to make their own choices and there is nothing you can do to stop them. You can warn them, counsel them, and love them but you can't force them.

I know I should have already "known" these lessons, but the truth is none of us KNOW these things until we expereince them first hand.

Steps in the right direction...Goals are being reached everyday. For starts I graduated college. Then took my GRE and will be submitting the last of my grad school applications next week. Then I will run a triathlon on April 30, hike Havasuipai Falls in the spring and visit at least one state I haven't seen before (Texas for my brother's wedding). I really want to get another intership before I leave for grad school, so the search is on. Obviously I'm also dating now. I thought my heart would never heal enough to head that direction, but I'm glad to say that it has.

Monday, November 1, 2010

This time around

Once again I will attempt to update life. Life is crazy and scary in an adventurous sort of way. I spent the summer up in Idaho. Turns out I gained some insight into being a "grown up" while I was there. I started the summer in misery because I was away from my amazing support system, my friends and family, who have carried me through some of the hardest moments of my life thus far. I was on my own and it turned out to be one of the most amazing oppurtunties that I have ever had. I grew! I showed myself that I could do it, that I was a capable young woman with the ability to "make it on my own". Although I was never completely alone. I relied on my faith and prayers to get me through some tough times.

Idaho was beautiful. I had mountains and lakes and trees and fresh air. All the things that I thought I had hated because I was from the city. I experienced swimming in a real lake, water skiing, and white water rafting for the first time. I did hiking, camping, fishing or rock climbing almost every other weekend, and I was able to get back to nature. I spent some nights sitting on the back porch watching storms, I put my feet in the river while I read a book, or I laid on the grass staring at clouds or stars. Nature has such a healing power. That healing power is simply from slowing down and seeing all the Beauty God has put around us.

My weekdays were spent doing what I love most....working with my kids. There is nothing more exciting then to see a child who may struggle with a difference take another step out of there comfort zone to accomplish something great, whether it be a social goal, overcoming a physical challenge or learning to explore the world around them! I loved seeing kids running around in the large open spaces, picking up bugs and getting a bit grimy. That is something that I really hadn't experience before. I'm from the city where kids are scared of bugs and there isn't fresh soil for the kids to dig in. We have parks, they have nature. I fell in love with the outdoors and I'm determined to get back to a place where I can live a life like that when the time comes that I will raise a future family.

I graduated with my bachelors and I'm back home now. While it isn't a disappointment it is an adjustment. I am out of school and I was unemployed. I took a job with a corporation. This is the first corporate position I've ever been in and I'm not doing so well with it. I don't think that any amount of money in this world could make this a dream job for me. I love waking up to a day where I get to do something for someone else and I definately don't feel like that is what I do here, but it pays the bills and the people I work with are pretty amazing.

As far as my next career step goes, graduate school is definately in the future. I know that in past blogs I have talked about getting my degree in education psychology or social work. That's not me...I'm pretty sure my path is clearly spelled out, but since there has been so many changes in my plans, I will wait until the path is clear before me before I say much else on the matter. I just know my future is with children in a therapy setting.

The trauma of divorce still lingers on. This is nothing that I'm complaining about. This is something that I'm determined to make it through so that I am a better person. When faced with a dating situation or a situation involving emotions from the opposite sex I have made some pretty silly mistakes in hopes of protecting my heart. I know that I will be okay one day, but for now I have alot I need to work on. It's like I'm sixteen again and dating for the first time (you know alot of awkward moments) but I will make it! Thanks to this situation of mine I have been able to meet some of the best women and make some incredible friends and put some perspective on my life as to who I am and what I am made of. I can't say this experience was awful. It made me who Heavenly Father knew I was capable of being and continues to have some influence of the decisions I make.

Finally...I have accomplished so many goals that I have placed before me, but I have still been missing a few because of lack of finances. Now that I don't have tuition to pay I can get to work on them. For the next few months i will be attempting to accomplish these goals. On my list, hiking Havasupai Falls in Arizona, traveling to at least three states that I have never been to before(and possible travel out of the country), and accomplishing my first triathlon. I have set a date for the triathlon; MAY 2011!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

A whole new world

I'm attempting once again to record some of the special moments of my life. Last time I wrote was almost 8 months ago. So much has changed and I've learned alot. To start off....life lesson #1 things never go as you plan. I got accepted to multiple recreation therapy internships, but I chose the one in Las Vegas. Heavenly Father on the other hand chose the one in Sun Valley, Idaho. An interesting place it is! Not the best expereince of my life, but the best experience I could have in order to benefit the children that I will work with one day, or to meet the people I needed to meet in order to gain perspective on where my future may take me.

That's right....my master's is not what I planned for either. I am now headed in the direction of educational psychology or clinical social work. I met this incredible woman who has the same passion I do for the children that we work with. She complimented my approaches and told me how natural I was with getting the appropriate behavior from the children with special needs and told me that I would enjoy that line of work more. So I checked it out and it turns out she was right. So even though I've had a miserable experience being up here, I know that I was supposed to work with this lady. Like I said things never go as planned....oh the places we'll go.

This is my last semester, and then I will officially have a bachelor's degree. You think that when you get here it will be a big deal, but it turns out that you really just feel the same. The only difference is that I will be jobless and I won't have to be at school. Hmmmmm.......I'm not too sure if that is great or scary or both.....

My sister had her baby. He's healthy and happy. They're both doing well and big brother has been great. He's been helping mommy and hanging out with baby.

Well let's hope that this time I actually stick around to keep up on this stuff

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

WOW!!!

Its been a long time, yet again, since I've written. School is almost over for this semester!!! Then its one more semester in the classrooms and a couple of internships to follow, then the decision on continuing on to Indiana or getting a real job and start paying back the student loans. Hard choice right?

This past week I was able to spend in Arizona. I was all over the place but spent most of my time in Morenci with my cousin Heather and her family. It was nice to relax and not feel like I was going a hundred miles an hour like I usually do. So thank you to them for the wonderful thanksgiving and letting me crash the party. I was also able to spend time with a couple of my other cousins too, which was a blast. I realized that I really like Arizona and I think I'm going to try and move down there for one of my two internships over the summer.

Other then that there's not much going on that's new. I know what an exciting life...but that's my life.

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving! Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Saturday, September 5, 2009

escuela por favor!

Hi! just going to write am update since its been such a long time. I got in a minor car accident a couple days ago...no worries I'm okay. I have to go to court though since my insurance card wasn't current. Dad gave me the wrong one when change companies...oops! And yes I will get the citation since it is considered my fault. I swirved to avoid getting hit by one car but ended up rearending the car infront of me that suddenly stopped. No biggy I guess.

School started 3 weeks ago and I feel like I can't get ahead. No matter how much I try I feel like I'm really far behind. It's going to be a really hard semester but I just have to keep reminding me of how close I am to the end and how soon I will be leaving Vegas to live in Bloomington to go to Indiana University for my master's program. I'm going to try and take an assistantship while I'm there to get some of my bills paid.

So as of now nothing too exciting but very soon I'll be off on a new adventure!

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

long weekends and busy summers

Nothing too exciting to report. Just finishing another summer semester. I went to Indiana the this past weekend for a leadership conference for an student organization the me and my friend are starting at UNLV. It's called Best Buddies. its a little like big brother/sister. except a person like you or i develops a friendship with a person that has a developmental disability. they hang out, do community service, and leadership projects together.

the place that the conference was held is also the place that i have been looking at for my master's program. That's right i want to live in Bloomington, Indiana and be a hoosier. (what is a hoosier by the way???) the campus was beautiful and the weather was a nice (but that's because it wasn't snowing). I have a really good feeling about it! so in about a year from now i may be headed back there for 2 years to study...we'll see in time.

i have pictures i want to share but for some reason my blog blocks them from being posted. does anyone know what i'm doing wrong???

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Hi

Hey everyone. I dropped off the face of the earth once again. I tried so hard to post pictures of my camp from over spring break but I think that my computer is too slow so I'm going to try doing it at school next Thursday...no promises though.

Just a little catch-up though. So I'm taking this culture and cuisine class at UNLV for my multiculural credit. Its been a blast and I've made some new friends and I've had alot of new experiences.

I had Dim Sum for the first time and if you've never had it....DO IT! It's a great experience. I do suggest taking a Chinese friend or a friend who has had alot of experience. I also had Thai, German, Spanish and Danish food for the first time. Its been a blast. Not only because I like to eat but also because I didn't realize how little I knew about other cultures.

The best part of this update is that there is a new chapter of the Best Buddies oraganization starting at UNLV and I have been asked my the president to be her vice president. Alex the president and I met last semester and we went to camp together. Best buddies program allows a "typical" person adopt a friend with a cognitive or developmental disability.

Finally I am starting to look at grad schools. Next summer will be my internship and then I will be starting grad school in the fall, unless I get a job offer that I can't pass up. So I'm thinking about Law school (for disability advocacy), alternative Recreation therapy (rock climbing, kayaking, camping for people with physical disabilities), or occupational therapy (pediatrics). So I'm going to apply for all of them, 9 schools total, but what do you all think?